Birth Mothers: 5 Reasons You Should Choose Gay Adoptive Parents for Your Child
Every type of adoption has its own unique advantages, but if you’re a birth mother who's opted for an open or semi-open adoption, you are much more likely to have the incredible opportunity to select and meet potential adoptive families for your child. For some this may be nerve-racking and for others, this may be exciting! The ability to meet your child’s adoptive family allows you to feel more in control of the adoption process and to ensure that your child will be loved, cared for and given every opportunity to have a happy life and a successful future.
Adopting a child has become of more and more interest among families in the United States, especially for gay folks who cannot conceive naturally. Unfortunately, gay singles, couples and other members of the LGBT community are less likely to be chosen as a child’s adoptive parents because of the discrimination that still exists against them today. Despite what many Americans believe, the sexuality and sexual orientation of a child’s parents has nothing to do with their ability to raise that child. Gay parents, just like heterosexual parents, are just as capable of providing a child love, care and support and should have every opportunity that heterosexual people do to grow their family!
5 Wonderful Reasons to Choose Gay Adoptive Parents for Your Child
1. There’s No Evidence to Prove Gay Parents are Less Effective or Successful than Straight Parents
A common opinion among people in the United States is that in order for children to be raised properly, they must grow up in a home with heterosexual parents (i.e. a child should have a father and a mother). But, contrary to what many people think, studies show that gay singles and couples are no less successful as parents and at raising children than heterosexual parents. The ability to love, care for and support a child comes from a person’s heart, not from his or her sexual orientation!
2. They’re Truly Ready to Embrace Parenthood
Is any person ever truly ready for parenthood? No, probably not, but gay adoptive parents are close! Since gay couples and individuals cannot conceive naturally, they must make the conscious decision to become parents -- unlike heterosexual couples, who sometimes get pregnant unexpectedly. When a gay couple or individual chooses to adopt, know that their decision to do so isn’t something they’ve decided upon in a day, a week or even a year. The adoption process is a lengthy and difficult one -- especially for LGBT folks! So, you can trust that they’ve put a great deal of serious thought and consideration into the commitments of both adoption and parenthood.
3. They’re More Likely to Educate Your Children about the Importance of Kindness, Acceptance and Equality
Gay couples and individuals often make the best parents because they’re more likely to raise your child to be open-minded and accepting of differences. They’re also more likely to teach your child the importance of advocating for equality and social justice, as gay folks and other members of the LGBT community are often confronted with discrimination from others.
Since every member of the LGBT community has likely faced discrimination at one point or another, gay adoptive parents can teach your child the importance of kindness and open-mindedness though their own experiences, which are often the best of teachers.
4. They’re More Understanding and Better at Overcoming Their Struggles
On a similar note, gay adoptive parents and other members of the LGBT community are often better at empathizing when your child is struggling with personal issues because they themselves have faced, and continue to face, discrimination and oppression from others. Thus, they’re often more understanding, more sensitive and will be better at teaching your child how to appropriately respond to negativity from others, which is something that many people struggle to do.
5. Their Relationships and Marriages have Proven to be More Stable than those of Heterosexual Parents
In more recent years -- and especially now that gay couples and individuals are legally allowed to get married -- studies have shown that the relationships and marriages between people within the LGBT community are more stable and secure than those of heterosexual people. Both stability and security within the home are vital because children need to feel comfortable in a safe space to be who they are and to share their thoughts and feelings. Gay adoptive parents can also provide your child with an example of what a stable, secure and healthy relationship looks like, so your child knows what to look for when seeking relationships in the future.
Gay Parents = Great Parents!
If you’re hesitant to choose a gay couple or individual to adopt your child, stop for a moment and think about why you’re hesitant. Do you have a hidden prejudice somewhere deep down inside of you? If you do, stop and think about that for a moment. Next, consider how certain people may view or judge you for simply trying to do what’s in the best interest of your child. People are quick to judge you, though they don’t even know you.
Before tossing aside the idea of having a gay couple adopt your child, consider for a moment the way you and others may judge people within the LGBT community without truly knowing who they are. It isn’t fair. They, like you, are human. And if there’s one thing humans have in common, it’s the need to be loved and to feel loved. Often, the people who make us feel that way are our family and friends. Gay couples, individuals and other members of the LGBT community are just as deserving of love and the chance to have a family.
A person’s sexuality and sexual orientation have no impact on his or her ability to love and raise a child, and to be a successful parent. As the birth mother, your focus should be on the person or the couple who is going to support your child no matter what. Who will give him or her every chance at a better future and, most importantly, who will show your child the unconditional, unwavering love that he or she deserves! If that person or couple happens to be gay, you should be more than willing to having them make your child a part of their growing family!
If you are a birth parent considering adoption, and have any questions or concerns about the process, please don’t hesitate to reach out. For more information on adoption, visit us at Adoption Choices of Florida or call us at: 800-985-8108