Birth Mothers: What to Include in Your Child’s Adoption Plan
Throughout the adoption process, you’ll make a lot of important decisions regarding your child’s future. Your most important duty, however, will be creating your child’s adoption plan. This is one of the first major steps in your child’s adoption process -- the purpose of creating the adoption plan is to map out the rest of the adoption process, reduce your stress levels and help you prepare for your due date, and plan for your child’s future.
If the idea of creating your child’s adoption plan puts you on edge, trust us when we say that you’re not the first birth mother to feel that way! Creating your child’s adoption plan can be tricky -- it’s common for a birth mother placing her child for adoption to constantly second-guess her decision. In those moments, just remember that you’re making decisions that you feel are in the best interest of both you and your child. You’re doing the right thing.
If you’re still concerned, Adoption Choices of Florida has got your back! Our team of caring, experienced professionals will be by your side every step of the way to comfort and support you as you make decisions about your future and -- most importantly -- your child’s future.
Creating Your Child’s Adoption Plan: What -- And Who -- to Include
The Type of Adoption
Choosing the type of adoption is not just about what you want, it’s about making a decision that you feel is in your child’s best interest. Including which type of adoption you’d like -- open, semi-open, or closed adoption -- it’s essential for you to include that in your adoption plan.
Open, semi-open, and closed adoption all have their pros and cons, so it’s up to you -- with the help of your adoption caseworker -- to determine which is the best fit for both you and your child. Again, prioritize your child’s best interest when considering the type of adoption, but also consider whether or not you’d like communication with your child and their adoptive family after the adoption and in the future. A huge part of choosing the type of adoption has to do with whether or not you’d like to build a relationship with your child and their family, and if you’d like to maintain contact once the adoption is finalized! Your adoption caseworker can help you consider your adoption options; but, ultimately, choosing the type of adoption is up to you. For more information on the pros and cons of each type of adoption, please visit Adoption Choices of Florida’s blog on the three types of adoption.
Your Preferences Regarding the Adoptive Parents/Family
Your involvement is crucial in this step of the adoption process. At this point, you must consider your preferences regarding your child's adoptive parents/family. Think about what kind of people you want to raise your child, how you want your child to be raised, what kind of opportunities you want your child to have in the future, and so on.
When considering the kind of family you want to adopt your child, you can be as broad or as specific as you want. Would it concern you if your child were to be adopted by a single parent or do you prefer your child to be raised in a two-parent household? Does the sexuality of your child’s adoptive parents matter to you? Would you rather your child be raised by adoptive parents who are of the same race, ethnicity, or religion as you? Do you have preferences regarding the occupations of your child’s adoptive parents? Again, consider what kind of future you want your child to have. Where do you want your child to grow up? Do you want your child to have siblings or pets? Maybe you wish for your child to go to college someday or travel the world? There’s a lot to consider when it comes to choosing your child’s adoptive family, so take time to really think about what’s the most important to you!
The People You’d Like to Include in the Adoption Process (A.K.A., Your Support Group)
It’s absolutely essential for you to have a strong system of support throughout your child’s adoption process. More often than not, birth mothers go through the adoption process alone -- birth fathers often choose not to be involved in the process -- so establishing a support group is an extremely important part of your adoption plan. Your adoption agency should have more than enough support resources for you to utilize as you move to each next step in the process, including adoption experts, social workers, therapists, and adoption attorneys. Additionally, you should include a team of family members and close friends in your adoption plan to comfort and support you as you make decisions regarding your child’s future.
Your Birth and/or Hospital Plan
Another important aspect of your adoption plan is creating your hospital or birth plan. Basically, your hospital and/or birth plan is a document created by you that consists of your preferences regarding your hospital stay at the time of your child’s birth and the birth of your child in general. If you’re newly pregnant, you’re probably wondering why you’d need to be creating your hospital or birth plan now. Though it may be just another for you to add to your to-do list right now, trust us, your future self will thank you if you get your hospital/birth plan figured out now versus a month or so before your due date!
Your preferences regarding your hospital stay and the birth of your child are just as important as your preferences regarding your child’s adoptive family -- you need to take time to really think about what’s most important. Preferences related to your hospital stay and your child’s birth include, but aren’t limited to:
Whether or not you’d like your child’s adoptive parents or another member of your support system in the room with you while you’re giving birth
If you’d like to give birth naturally, have an epidural, or have an elective C-section
Who will hold the child first and if you’d like alone time with your child
If you’d like photos or videos taken of you with your child
Who will keep hospital mementos like the child’s hospital ID bracelet, baby blanket, and so on.
It’s very important that you’re prepared for your due date, so don’t hesitate to be specific when creating your hospital and/or birth plan!
Make Every Decision with Your Child’s Best Interest in Mind!
It’s common for women going through an unplanned pregnancy to feel rushed to make decisions about their child’s future once they’ve committed to adoption. That said, it’s actually extremely important for you to take time to consider your options regarding your child’s adoption, as whatever you choose is going to have a major impact on their future. So, if the idea of creating your child’s adoption plan still sounds a little intimidating to you, that’s totally OK! As intimidating as it may be to you, you’re your child’s decision-maker right now. So long as you prioritize your child’s best interest and trust both your gut and your parental instincts, you will without a doubt make decisions that ensure your child is loved and cared for, their life is full and happy, and that their future is secure.
If you are a birth parent considering adoption, and have any questions or concerns about the process, please don’t hesitate to reach out. For more information on adoption, visit us at Adoption Choices of Florida or call us at: 800-985-8108